Deathbed Promises

Now that I’ve had first hand experience of a deathbed promise, I think it’s a cruel imposition on the living.

I made promises that I now find difficult to fulfill.  Sometimes you want to but circumstances prevent you.  

My mom wanted me to assure her that I would protect an aunt’s possession from the infighting of her children.  Though I know I am objective enough and have the discernment to do so – I don’t think I will be able to.  I am not my mom.  I do not have her authority.  She was an aunt to my cousins.  When she talked, my cousins listened.  I am these cousins’ level and younger than they all are.  Who am I to make decisions for their mom?  

I am not stupid enough to proceed knowing the circumstances.  I know I will not be an effective mediator for this relative’s problem.  What was I thinking promising my mom?  That is the problem- when death is near, one rarely thinks.  

But I made a promise.  In whatever way I can, I will but to the extent that my mom wanted me to do when she is gone – I simply am unable to do.

When I am on my deathbed and if i have the opportunity, I will not hold my husband nor my children to any promises.  That would be cruel to them.  I have lived my life.  They will live theirs.  I have no right to impose upon them after I have left this earth.

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